August 18th 2012
Feeling Lost or Out of Place
Itís understandable to feel lost or out of place from time to time especially when on the path to enlightenment. Iím beginning to believe this is because of the fact that there was always something before, so now that there is nothing, there is a sense of something strange and unknown. I donít think itís a bad thing at all. In fact, I believe it is good to have these feelings, but with the feelings, you also need to be aware of them and why they are there. If you donít, you WILL be lost.
Right now, as I write this at approximately quarter after 3 in the morning on August 18th 2012, I am feeling lost. Iím not sure what Iím supposed to be doing, or where my life is supposed to be going. I know that what I am doing is right. I know that I am on the right path and things fall in line, but I just feel lost and alone. I am not used to this feeling. When meditating on the ďwhyĒ, I was told ďitís okĒ, and that ďitís part of the separation from the mundane world; separation from the social interaction and need of what once wasĒ.
I know the message is right. I know that this world is an illusion. All existence is illusion, but it is also an illusion that is created on a mass scale and is very intricately intertwined with all other branches of ego that the one is split into. We are here to experience everything from every aspect we can.
I often think that the one got so bored and there was nothing because it is everything so it decided to branch itself off into many beings on many levels of existence and created multiple realities in which these ďbeingsĒ reside. By doing so gives a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment, because after all, the only ego that need exist, is the whole, and that is not us as separate beings. We are a whole being together, but apart, we are needy.
I donít even know if what Iím writing makes any sense anymore. I tuned out a few minutes ago while I was typing and I am not even really looking at the message that is coming through anymore.
I just know that to be alone is ok. To accept being alone is better. To be near others is ok too. But in order to be happy and to be in a tranquil state, we must all find our way of being. We need to find what is right for each of us and go with it and be; not only be, but be peaceful and harmonious with everything and everyone.
This is one of those times that I have slipped off into a more tranquil state and have shut off everything around me and just sit and type. I am at peace and I donít even realize what is being put down on paper. I love these moments. Itís kind of funny when I go over these documents later though. Iíll start reading through and say to myself ďdid I write that?Ē and be in complete bewilderment. I laugh to myself and just continue to read as if Iím reading someone elseís message. After all, most of the time it IS someone elseís message; thatís why I donít remember writing it.
I wish I could do more to help this world and the people in it. I wish I could go out and just give everyone what they need. I know the time is coming where that will happen, but I really want to be able to give it now. I know that I will be needed when the proverbial shit hits the fan, and I am ready. Well, I feel that I am ready; I guess only time will tell.
Speaking of time, I know that it has been mentioned before, but I will mention it again because it can never be said too many times, time does not exist anywhere but in our minds. Time is a group collective consciousness of how this reality holds itself in place. Time is the biggest of the ties that holds us down and keeps us ďgroundedĒ. Really, we shouldnít WANT to be grounded, we should want to soar. Time does not allow us to be free. Time holds us to a ďnormĒ that is not normal for our bodies or our minds. We need to grasp the concept of what time really is in order to rid ourselves of it and just live. That is one of the first steps toward happiness and freedom.
There are so many people out there that think they NEED to work in order to survive. This is not so. People survived before society as it is today, and we can do it again. Yes, itís good that we have such amenities now such as running water, indoor plumbing, electricity, etc, but we donít need to slave away in offices and factories for corporations who control everything and manufacture garbage just to say we are making it. These companies mass produce the cheapest products possible that just end up in landfills very quickly and then you have to buy more. Thatís consumerism for you. Itís terrible, and it makes me sick.
Cars should last a lot longer than 5 years like their target is. Itís all about money. And what is money? Control. Money is the carrot dangling in front of the donkey to get it to work. We donít need it and we can live without it if people get educated on it instead of just living the way that their parents lived and their parents lived and the false knowledge that has been passed on for generations. Iím tired of hearing ďThatís the way it is, and thatís the way itís been, and you canít change it.Ē You CAN change it, and it has to start somewhere, so start now!