[Update!] What's going on right now

Well as many of you know the rotten year my friend and I have had, we've been heaped upon again. I don't understand what either of us doing to deserve so much heaping. I'll explain.

Many of you know about my friends stay in the hospital and rehab for physical therapy affter a fractured wrist. She is an 80 year old widow. Well we were told by the state she wasn't eligibal for Medicaid because of "too much money" in her gross income of Social Security, but was qualified for some stupid program and subsequently enrolled in cost of share program, they then would take care of medical bills from the hospital. They also had an in home health care program in which they sent out a social worker who faxed out the bills to the state. Yes, we have cover letter, sent out July 30th. Well, on Oct. 22 she received a letter from an attorney representing the hospital. They want $1156.00 neither one of us have.

Now what's going on at the apartment? Well we received a letter about a full building inspection on Oct. 8th. A week laer one of their maintenance personal came around and with a two page document, cleverly with top page underneath and had her sign the second sheet, didn't want to give either of us time to read it, said was supposed to be in case they sold the place, and did not answer my question if they were selling. He works close with the old management he would've known. Well they did the following week she met the new owners, who never actually said who they were, nor did they have a business card wih a way to contact, Flashforward to today, someone representing the city water department came around a left notices on ours and other doors about paying a $758.00 in cash, yeah like that's going to happen, "was their way so we could tell the owner" well we called the previous property manager and "she claimed not to know who bought the place,(she's a real estate broker, or who knew who the new management" we were supposed to send the rent today. So the city's going to shut off our water in 5 days if not paid.

My question is How much more of this are we supposed to take? Is there anything we can do to stop this constant bad luck? Does anyone know, if so please tell me. While the previous three years have not been stellar by any means, this has definately been the worst.

2loserel3 said:

My question is How much more of this are we supposed to take? Is there anything we can do to stop this constant bad luck? Does anyone know, if so please tell me. While the previous three years have not been stellar by any means, this has definately been the worst.

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All I can say is I know for a fact, from my own experiences and from what I've heard from other people that if you focus on the bad, it will undoubtedly continue and get worse the more you focus on it, however, if you focus in on any good that you have going on, you will tend to see more good and have more to focus on to keep the good flowing in. It's difficult, I know, to try to focus past all the negative and really bad things that are going on with and around you guys right now, but you must try if you want to turn things around. I hate to see you like this and I want for you to make your immediate world better, so do me the favor and TRY to focus on any amount of good that you have going on right now and anything that you see that is good. There is good everywhere and once you find it, you're better off for it. Does that make sense? There is positive in EVERYTHING if you look hard enough you can see it.

Hi,

Thanks for your concern. The water issue was taken care of. The new owner says she'll meet with all of us, so far no meeting. Will try to do as you ask, sorry sometimes I feel like I'm butting my head against brick wall. I've heard of the idea but as usual something happens to keep us from trying it. Now the holidays don't help either.

I know it can seem to be the most difficult thing to do, and most times people give up on it because they see no point, but I assure you, it works. Even if you find the simplest thing to look at as a positive to start, just look for it and you will start to see more and it DOES get easier.

I am glad to hear that at least 1 thing was taken care of. And hopefully, that owner will actually keep to her word.

Good luck!!!!! Stay positive, even if it's only tiny little things to start!!

Thank you, I will definately try to be a little bit more positive Partly I know the root of the problem, an unhappy childhood, I was the one kid that never fit in with the others, and they liked to pick on me about it, needless, to say I don't have much self-confidence, and I'm awkward with people until I get to know them better, and now an unhappy and unsuccessful adulthood.Fortunate that I'm not growing up nowdays though the way they are here,in our public school, well then, my experience was a picnic. But I do try to forget about those days in school.

2loserel3 said:

Partly I know the root of the problem, an unhappy childhood, I was the one kid that never fit in with the others, and they liked to pick on me about it, needless, to say I don't have much self-confidence, and I'm awkward with people until I get to know them better, and now an unhappy and unsuccessful adulthood.Fortunate that I'm not growing up nowdays though the way they are here,in our public school, well then, my experience was a picnic. But I do try to forget about those days in school.

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I know that story all too well. I've learned to look back on my days (which were very similar in what you describe) and as I reflect I look at the positive that DID come out of it all. I was teased and left out and made to feel like hell and that I shouldn't exist. But, there are some of those experiences that have made me stronger and I can see that now. I wouldn't be who I am today without it all. And THAT is a positive. It takes time to see it all that way, but with a little effort, ok sometimes a lot of effort,lol, THAT's just one example of how to take the positives from everything. It WILL get better, if you allow it to,but it won't change if you don't change your focus on perspective.

Sorry to hear you went though that as well, no kid should have to endure it, most definately.I will definately try to think of something positive that came out of the situation. i think one thing I probably wouldn't have turned my back on the city I grew up in and I wouldn't have met my friends. i knew her husband as well, except for a problem with alcohol he would've given you the shirt off his back if he thought it would help you out. He wasn't an every day alcoholic went in on binges, but that was part of the reason why he wouldn;t admit he had a problem. They had been married 46 years, closest thing to parents I'll ever know.

It's clear that you have found SOMETHING positive to start with. That's great! Now, to keep that going, whenever something bad happens, whenever something goes 'wrong', whenever life seems to be putting you in the (excuse my language here) 'shitter', look at what could possibly be positive about the situation. Like I said, it DOES get easier. And everything happens for a reason, although those reasons at the time of the occurrence are unknown.

Well, I've always heard that things happen for a reason, I guess I have to figure out why, or maybe it'll be shown to me at a later date will try to be more positive and open-minded.

Will try not analyze everything that happens, on a personal scale, I'm kind of notorius for that.

2loserel3 said:

Well, I've always heard that things happen for a reason, I guess I have to figure out why, or maybe it'll be shown to me at a later date will try to be more positive and open-minded.

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That's the spirit! A start to a great way of looking at life!

2loserel3 said:

Will try not analyze everything that happens, on a personal scale, I'm kind of notorius for that.

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Aren't we all? I think most of us have a bad habit of analyzing and over-analyzing everything that happens to us and taking/making things personal. I like to call it the "Why Me?" Syndrome. It seems to be natural to do, but it can be overcome (not 100% for 100% of the time no one is perfect).

Glad to see the reply box working again, tried to respond yesterday it didn't want to come up.

Why me syndrome is a good name to call it. Glad to hear it can be overcome. Will try to work at my negativity. I know I have a tendancy to be pessimistic, and it's not good.

2loserel3 said:

Glad to see the reply box working again, tried to respond yesterday it didn't want to come up.

Why me syndrome is a good name to call it. Glad to hear it can be overcome. Will try to work at my negativity. I know I have a tendancy to be pessimistic, and it's not good.

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Hmm. Strange that the box disappeared like that. Around what time would you say that was? I'm wondering if it was at the exact time Rumas was upgrading? Well, if it happens again, let me know asap.

Yes, it CAN be overcome, but it takes effort. No one can break you from it but YOU. This has been my teachings since I was a kid. Yes, I have my moments too where I go into a slump of negativity, but I choose not to share those moments with others and only have positivity in my dealings with others. It's ok to vent the negativity, but it has to be done in a way that others don't pick it up and take it into themselves.

Like I said before, it gets easier to see positive the more you look. Sometimes you have to look backward to move forward.

Thanks for the advice, and info. I do know some people are sensitive to pick up emotions,and some thrive on them, like psychic vampires. I'll try to tone down my venting some more.

Will let you know if the reply box happens again. I usually just assume it's on my side, what with this wi-fi public network and with my limited knowledge of computers. Oh, I can do the basics like e-mail, word, and download pictures and programs, also basic information about people , (the no pay info, not much info kind.(never uploaded anything in my life though). Never thought of an upgrade, but if it needs to be done it has to be done sometime. Maybe some way though of doing it without effecting things, though.

Sounds like there are some kindred spirits here. I've had my year of rotten starting at the end of Oct. 2011. I keep putting one paw in front of the other, hope I don't trip over the lint on the carpet, and tell myself things will get better. Most days it works. I was also the misfit picked on kid in school. Then I figured out that a lot of people don't see and hear what I do. When I hear hoofbeats, I don't think horses. I think purple striped zebras. It is what it is.

Cat

First of all welcome to the forum. I think you'll find alot of nice people here, I know I have.Looking forward to reading your posts.

Sounds like we do have alot in common. No kid should go through the picked on experience, just my humble opinion. It does seem to help not to dwell on it. Sometimes it works, I seem to get that way though when everything seems to be dumping on me at one time, though I do try not to think about it.

2loserel3 said:

It does seem to help not to dwell on it. Sometimes it works, I seem to get that way though when everything seems to be dumping on me at one time, though I do try not to think about it.

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If you haven't read this already, you probably should. It may help. It touches on the downward spiral of depression.

https://unhypnotize.com/channeling/...learn-move-lady-light-november-14-2012-a.html

I've gotten better, over the years, at taking care of me, instead of trying to "fix" everybody else. As long as I can respect myself, the rest of it will work out.

Cat

Sounds like a plan After all we can't change everything to our liking, unfortunately. Wonder what would happen if we could? Any ideas on that?

Let's just imagine that we could. Hmm, possibly, it would be chaos. If I could arrange things the way I want, and my ex could arrange things the way he wants, it just wouldn't work. He says we never cshould have split up. I say he'd be dead if we hadn't. I love my husband, and have no interest in being with someone who left when our daughter was a month old. I can be on cordial terms with him out of respect for our daughter and our grandkids. But after thirty-four years, I've moved on.

Of course, if I could tweak a couple of things, that would be okay. I'd be taller, and I'd have the horse I've always wanted.

Cat

You're lucky to have found someone that fills the void of your initial choice. I can't blame you for not wanting to stay with a man who didn't wish to stay with you and his daughter. At least for the sake of your daughter it's as amicble as it can be. My grandmother left my grandfather after 34 years of marriage and moved on with her life. Wasn;t that amicable between my grandparents, I met him once at my mother's funeral.

If I could, change, things, perhaps I wouldn't have made some mistakes I made when I was a few years younger. I might've met my friends under different circumstances. (better) some of the things that have happened now to us, might not have happened. That would be what I would arrange.